Understanding "Our Stuff"

Understanding "Our Stuff"

September 27, 2024

We’ll call him Danny.

There was something about Danny that just got under my skin more than other kids.

I was unsure as to why.

It could’ve been something obvious like he was a Junior acting like a 9^th grader.

But that was too simple.

It could’ve been because I was a new teacher.

But I wasn’t.

I was eight years into my career.

While my colleagues told me Danny was talkative in class, none of them seemed to share my almost instinctual negative response to him.

He wasn’t even that rude.

He was actually a really good student.

Why did he annoy me so much?

My answer would come a couple of years later as I sat in a Professional Development In-Service Training.

It changed the way I’ve managed my classroom ever since.

Chris Emdin, Phd. is the Robert Naslund Endowed Chair in Curriculum and Teaching and Professor of Education at the University of Southern California.

Previously, Chris was an Associate Professor of Science Education in the Department of Mathematics, Science, and Technology at Teachers College, Columbia University, where he also served as associate director of the Institute for Urban and Minority Education.

He is the creator of the #HipHopEd social media movement and Science Genius B.A.T.T.L.E.S.

He was also named Multicultural Educator of the Year by the National Association of Multicultural Educators and has been honored as a STEM Access Champion of Change by the White House.

Just that…. :-)

The guy is cool.

He is also the best teacher-speaker that I’ve ever had the pleasure of sitting in front of.

Here’s what he challenged me to do:

Think of the three most rewarding students that I had ever taught.
Write down their names.
Then, write down three adjectives to describe each one of those students.
Take a minute and think about why I loved those kids so much.

Such nice memories.

I could rattle off those kids’ names right now. They are the kids that make me love this profession so much.

Then Chris had me do this:

Think of the three most challenging students that I had ever taught.
Write down their names.
Then, jot down three adjectives to describe each of those students.

Then he told us to take a moment to really think about those kids.

It’s always been uncomfortable for me to admit that some kids just got under my skin too much.

I have this fundamental belief that all kids want to do the right thing.

They do.

All of them. Regardless of how they behave.

I believe this to my core—and I did back then too.

And then Chris dropped this line on me…

“That stuff you didn't like about the second set of kids? Yeah, that's more about you than it is about the kids.”

(Mental gasp. Silence.)

Ufff....

That made me think. And I didn't like it at first.

Chris called it "our stuff".

He was right.

As teachers, we need to take responsibility for “our stuff” that we bring into the classroom.

And then remove it.

Permanently. Forever.

What Chris taught me (and everyone else in the theater that day) was that we all have a certain profile of student that “pings” us.

Annoys us.

Almost irrationally.

Wait.

Definitely irrationally.

Yeah, that’s because there’s something about that profile of student that triggers something in ourselves that we over-respond to because they ping something deep inside of us.

It’s like the stereotypical grumpy grandfather who is constantly silencing his grandkids.

It's not the grandkids; it's the grumpy old dude who can't deal with childhood joy. It pings him too much.

Yeah...

And so, every little side comment, or pinch of the back of his buddy's arm, or thinly veiled giggle was a piercingly-high-pitched attack on my soul…

Ping. Ping. Ping. Ping.

You know what I’m talking about?

Most likely you do.

That's "your stuff” getting in the way of connecting with a child.

That's "your stuff” getting in the way of a kid's education.

That's "your stuff” getting in the way of being the kind of teacher you want to be.

And as adults, as teachers, and as role models…

We gotta be better than that.

So how are we gonna do that? That’s what we’re going to talk about next Friday.

Until then, just think about your “pingers”.

Who are they for you?

What do they tell you about you?

What is "your stuff" and how did it get there?

Who is your Danny?

If you’re like me, that’ll be enough for a bit.

See you next week.